onmymindwriter
My Positively Ever Changing Life
Posted in December 2011 …
The Rut, & the Way Out from the Zen Habits Blog
Post written by Leo Babauta.
You’re in a rut, and you can’t get unstuck.
Motivation is a resource that seems harder and harder to come by these days. You’re mired in malaise, you’re unexcited after a slump or a break, you’re in a dull 9-to-5 routine.
Any of these sound familiar?
If so, you’re not alone. I’ve been in these kinds of ruts, often, and sometimes for embarrassingly extended periods. While it doesn’t happen much these days, as I’m excited about everything I do, I’m no stranger to the rut. I was stuck in one for a couple years once, until I felt the rut wasn’t something I was in, but was me.
What is the way out? How do you start along this way if you don’t have motivation to start with?
I’ve found that the best way out of a rut is with the smallest step possible. But that step can result in more than you realize.
What if that smallest step is to announce a major challenge? In my recent past I’ve announced 30 days of yoga, writing a novel in 30 days, and some grueling physical challenges. In years past I’ve announced that I’m going to run a marathon, do a triathlon, start a blog, give up my car, give up meat, and so on.
Here’s the thing: the first step wasn’t to take on a major challenge. It was simply announcing it. And announcing something is really really easy. Doing it is much harder, but once you’ve announced it, you have some momentum, and you’re committed to a direction. Making the announcement only takes the moving of your lips and some hot air, or the typing of your fingers while your email program is open, and let’s face it, you do those things even when you’re in a rut.
Like this:
A Christmas Photo For You!
Like this:
Christmas Quote
“I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way (s)he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.”
― Maya Angelou
Like this:
Beautiful insight…
“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a “living” is not the same thing as making a “life.” I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Maya Angelou
Like this:
Quoting…
“A few times in my life I’ve had moments of absolute clarity when, for a few brief seconds, the silence drowns out the noise and I can feel rather than think and things seem so sharp and the world seems so fresh, it’s as though it had all just come into existence. I can never make these moments last. I cling to them, but like everything, they fade. I have lived my life on these moments. They pull me back to the present, and I realize that everything is exactly the way it was meant to be.”
~ Colin Firth, A Single Man
Like this:
The Many Reasons We Rely Upon Our Clutter
Post written by Leo Babauta.
Clutter isn’t an easy problem to solve, no matter how many times I might tell you to toss it out, tell you that you don’t need it.
A book isn’t just an object with words on it. A jewelry box isn’t just a container. Clothes aren’t just protection from the elements.
Each of these inanimate objects means so much more to us.
We put our emotions into them. We rely upon these objects to fulfill needs in us.
They are our crutches.
These crutches are convenient, because they save us from having to learn to cope with tough things. We’ve relied on these crutches often since childhood, and our culture has programmed them into us. If I point them out, some of you may get angry at me. That’s OK. Anger is an appropriate response — I’ve felt it myself when these issues came up in me.
What are we to do when we discover these crutches? We can’t just toss them out and think we’re done. We have to find new ways of dealing with our emotions and the world around us. Let’s start today.
The Roles of Clutter
These aren’t all true for every person, but I’ve found they’re very common:
1. Security. When we have lots of stuff around us, we feel more secure. Somehow it’s as if we can survive the apocalyptic winter, or at least an earthquake or economic recession.
New habit: Learn to combat fears with information. What’s the worst-case scenario? What could you do in that case even without the items around you? Do you have people you could rely on? Can you learn skills that don’t require clutter? Could you live without? Try it for a little while and see.
2. Self image and self worth. Clothes and jewelry and shoes and handbags make women feel pretty, feel attractive, feel good enough as a woman. Men rely on clothes, gadgets, hats and other accessories, tools, sometimes weaponry. We feel manly and good enough. Buying these things — shopping — is an activity that fills us with more self-worth, or at least staves off the feelings of inadequacy.
New habit: Learn that you don’t need external objects to be attractive or good enough. You are already perfect. Learn to love yourself as you are, without self improvement. Most people aren’t judging you, and if they are, they are not good for you.
3. Memories and holding on to the past. Photo albums, mementos, gifts from loved ones, yearbooks and other school memorabilia, souvenirs, books, trophies, plaques, framed photos, sometimes old clothes … these objects and more hold emotions and memories from the past. They represent good times, perhaps better times, perhaps love from someone special, past glory, shared experiences. But this is living in the past, and while the past is important, it isn’t your life.
New habit: Learn to live in the present. Let the past go, like an old friend who has come to visit and has now left. You can always revisit this old friend later, but there’s no need to hold onto her. Let her live her life, and you live yours. You don’t need objects to represent memories and good times and glory, because those objects aren’t those good times or glory. Those objects aren’t the love that they represent. Live new good times, make new love.
Like this:
Barbie turns 50…
Thank goodness Barbie doesn’t have a strict Mom, otherwise she would be in a lot of trouble. Mattel has unveiled its newest version of the 50-year old doll, which features permanent tattoos on the neck, chest and arm. This has caused some controversy… But really, don’t most Barbies have messy, sharpie-drawn tattoos within the first few weeks anyways?
